Friday, 11 December 2009

Lost my way a bit. It's time to get back on the zafu.

I drifted quite a bit for a month or so. Barely sat at all and even missed my Sunday zazenkai a couple of times. Well, three times, but only one was because I just didn't want to go. The others were due to work commitments. I haven't touched this blog for weeks. I just lost myself in the noise of my mind, or, more like, let go and allowed myself to be deafened by it.

These last few days I've been labouring under a chest infection of sorts and I've lost a lot of sleep. Today I was particularly down and I knew why. I'm letting the world impinge on me, get the better of me. I can't hand the responsibility for my well-being over to my mind, or my ego. So right now, I'm making a start to get back onto an even keel. I'm going to have a shower, get dressed in my loose house clothes and take my zafu out from the cupboard. I'll sit for as long as it's comfortable and after that I'll get back to mindfulness in my daily living to the best of my ability.

I'll continue the Eiheiji blog as soon as I get settled. I want to tell you about the morning morning after the night before, Dogen style!

3 comments:

  1. Thanks for the update, wasn't sure if you were still posting here or not. Feel better.

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  2. Looking forward to reading more.

    RC

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  3. Thank you for your efforts! Practicing ain't easy and that's why it's called the practice. When we loose our motivation and forget zafu but when we get back on practicing... without any idealism at all, that is THE real practice. To sit again, over and over and over again.

    Looking forward to read your posts.

    With best regards,
    Markus

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